a PSI of relief!

I'm instituting a scale for my morning sickness. Keep this in mind for future posts. It's sorta like the 10 stages of drunkenness (see below), only a lot worse because there's simply no joy (now) in reaching any of the following levels.
1- Nausea free! (technically, I haven't felt like this since January 1)
2- Fully functional. This means I can do normal stuff, but feel like I'm on a boat
3- Open with strangers. When asked how I'm doing, I tell them the truth: shitty. But I can complete most activities, minimally rushing to the bathroom
4 - Dizzy and paranoid. Will I make it to the grocery store? And back?
5- Show me the sickness bags. Keep them close, because this is gross.
6- This can't be normal.
7- I know how dirty it is on my bathroom floor.
8- I know I smell but I don't care, I'm not going anywhere.
9- Comatose.
10- One kid will be more than enough.
After a weekend of hovering around 7/8, am delighted to say that today was merely a 3/4 on the morning sickness scale. I started out heading toward another high number but somehow turned it around. How?

PSI BANDS!

Ok, so I'm a sucker for anything that might make me feel normal. And I admit, I paid $16 for two somewhat chic things that look like Swatch wrist bands from 5th grade. I put them on around 9am because I wasn't doing well on my own and figured they couldn't hurt. I purchased these last week after talking briefly with my doctor, who asked how I was feeling at week 5 and a half and when I said, "I kinda feel like I'm on a boat," she said, "Just wait." I figured that didn't bode well, so I immediately went to the internet and found everything I possibly could that might alleviate the symptoms looming around the corner. I'm not sold on the ginger and lemon infused spray yet, but I'm grateful for these little plastic bands:


Within an hour of putting them on, I was beginning to feel like I might have a normal day. I managed to eat some dry cereal and keep it down! This was huge! I did some laundry! I opened the refrigerator! I still ran to the bathroom a few times, but not nearly as much as I have over the past 3 days. A window on a new day was opening thanks to my trendy little wrist bands.

To confirm that this wasn't all in my head, it's 12 hours later and I just took them off. They really work. Seriously. I've already been to the bathroom twice in the past 30 minutes and while I am regretting their removal and not looking forward to another night of misery, I don't think I should wear them all the time. Gotta look into that more. But I'm definitely putting them back on tomorrow.

And here are the 10 Stages of Drunkenness, because I know you're curious:
(A special thanks to a former CBS boss, who shall remain nameless-- you taught me more than you know...)
Everyone starts 0) Sober
1) Witty and Charming
2) Rich and Powerful
3) Benevolent
4) Clairvoyant
5) Fuck Dinner
6) Patriotic
*7) Crank Up the Enola Gay
8) Witty and Charming, Part II
9) Invisible
10) Bulletproof